''Epics in Minutes''

(The Secret 'ish' 7'')

........ ........... ........?

 Generic white dust cover, most are hand-numbered in
bottom left-hand corner.
Most are numbered out of 1000

Self released by band, labels same as Deranged releases, but without Deranged Logo

Picture Sleeve - Front:
Folded paper with photocopied image on one side. Various images were used - see below for more examples.
Not all copies have a picture sleeve, some just have the dust cover described above. 

Picture Sleeve - Folded out


Tracks: Epics in Minutes B/W Search For The Words
Released: 2003
Label: Self Released - FU: 001

Pressing Info:
Believed to be 300, but numbered out of 1000, some have the fake epics vinyl...

No regular insert.
    Several different sleeves and covers, many are unique.


    Most come with a generic white dust sleeve numbered out of 1000. Some also come with a fold-out photocopied picture sleeve, some are also personalised. There are various jacket pictures, some of the images have been used more than once, but may be cropped differently. Some of the images reference FU themes, others are random. A few examples are shown below.

    Given away, the name of the person receiving the record was (supposedly) recorded in a note book to deter flipping. Has 'Red Herring' message etched into run-out; see also 'Baiting with Epics Labels'. It's generally supposed that there were 300 copies; compared to the other singles, a lot seem to have been kept by the original owners.      

    Some disks may be fake?

    Sleeve Variations:

    #24/1000 - Man in medical mask

    # 55/1000 - 'Blonde woman in zip-top' - half panel of sleeve
    #59/1000 - 'Saddam Hussein with sword' - comes with ''stomp on a mod!'' stamped poly cover

    #? / 1000 'Stomp' stamped / type-writen sleeve (pic from FU instagram)
    #60/1000 - 'Mark Frechette'
    #61 & #65/1000 - 'Saddam Hussein with sword' - two records, same image on sleeve, but cropped and orientated differently
    #61 - Reverse of above (left) sleeve, image orientated 'landscape'
    #65/1000 - Reverse of above (right) sleeve, image orientated 'portrait'
    # 78/1000 - 'Blonde woman in zip-top' 
    #88 Hitler - Same copy as above, this one has had a few owners.
    Modern Nazis use the number 88 as an abbreviation for the salute Heil Hitler. The letter H is eighth in the English alphabet, whereby 88 becomes HH.
    # 98/1000 - 'Dance of Death' detail 

    # 119/1000 -  Re-used generic Artista sleeve. Dust sleeve personalised with typed text by JF for Eric Smith (former drummer in Career Suicide) 
    # 119/1000 - As described above
    # 119/1000 - As described above
    # 159/1000 - No picture sleeve 
    # 198/1000 - No picture sleeve (this copy has baiting the public vinyl according to Sarah's list)
    The following copies also do not have picture sleeves:
    # 106/1000
    # 164/1000
    # 166/1000 
    # 170/1000
    # 186/1000 
     # 203/1000 - ''Two figures 'wrestling' in front of a vehicle'' 
    # 207/1000 - 'Man walking past oriental text banner'
    # 228/1000 - 'Kid with cowboy gun' 
    #?/1000 - Bonnie 'fellating' a soda bottle. (Image of Faye Dunaway as 'Bonnie' From the movie 'Bonnie & Clyde')
    (Number info unavailable)
    #?/1000  - 'Two school girls in boater hats with a dog' Image used on 1988 Quantas airlines advert (number info unavailable)

    #?/1000  - Saddam Hussein with sword (number info unavailable)
    (as seen on ebay - same image as 59, 61 & 65, but confirmed as not being one of these)
    #?/1000 - Japanese communal bath (number info unavailable)

    Collection pic: The middle 2 records are 'Epics in Minutes' The left-hand one is #88 (yet again). The right-hand one (trees and a basket-thing?) will have to remain a secret for the time-being.

    Bottom left hand side is 'Baiting The Public' (Wrong label version)

    #?/1000 - Extract from rejected image for 'Epics in Minutes' CD (Josh smirking)

    See comment below
    #?/1000 - Woman in (hospital?) bed. Top pic cover opened, bottom cover folded

    #? - #? - A box full of epics disks before they got packaged up and numbered


    (Message on reverse of sleeve)

    Sleeve- Front

    Sleeve - Back
    Vinyl - A & B sides
    'Regular' insert - Front: Policeman chasing kids + 'Police' lyrics

    'Regular' insert - Reverse: Mug shots of Toronto
    City Councillors (and band) + 'Municipal Pricks' lyrics


    Tracks: Police B/W Municipal Prick / Old Bill
    Year: 2003
    Label: Deranged Records DER-33
    Matrix B: DERANGED YOUTH-33-B 5-R

    Pressing Info:
    1st Press 1200 (10 with hand-drawn sleeve) (6 Test Presses)
    2nd 500
    3rd 1000
    4th and later - unknown

    1st Press - 'Regular' insert + 'Old Bill' insert (There are at least 6 different Old Bill inserts, see images below)
    2nd Press - 'Regular' insert (folded opposite way to all other releases) + Deranged Records Flyer
    3rd & later - 'Regular' insert
      Three variants of 'regular sleeve - see images below
      Hand-drawn sleeve

      Sleeve Variations:
      Above: Three different sleeves (fronts) overlapped for comparison.

      1st & 2nd Press -   (Cream coloured shiny paper).  Front: Small gap between Deranged logo and bottom corner of sleeve. Inside: Cover artwork repeated on inside of sleeve.  Back: FU logo in top right corner has white background. 

      3rd & 4th Press -  (White paper).  Front: No Deranged logo. Image cropped more than first press, (Bearded man on right-hand side has no ear showing, first 'L' Missing from LA LOIRE 20 sign on left-hand side. Inside: No artwork on inside of sleeve. Back: FU logo in top right corner has clear background. 

      5th & later -  (White paper).  Front: Big gap between Deranged logo and bottom corner of sleeve. Image cropped as per 3rd / 4th press. Inside & Back: As per 3rd / 4th press. Sleeve slightly larger  from top to bottom than the previous ones - see pics.
      Above: Three different sleeves (backs) overlapped for comparison.

      1st or 2nd Press?
      The 1st and 2nd press can be told apart by the inserts:
      Above: A number of 1st press (LHS) & 2nd press (RHS), laid out to make the following comparisons:
      1. (Top) The 'Old Bill' inserts are unique to the first press, see below. The second press usually has a Deranged Records Flyer, showing a pair of rats and advertising various releases including the 'Epics in Minutes' CD comp.
      2. (Middle) The 'regular' insert is folded with the faces on the outside on the second press. This is unique to the second press. The first press and all the later presses have the 'cop chasing naked kids' image on the outside.
      3. (Bottom) The first and second press have identical sleeves as described above.

      'Old Bill' Inserts:
      These are approx A4 size. On one side they have an image plus lyrics to Police (sort of) written in Cockney rhyming slang, under the heading 'Old Bill'. There are at least six different inserts (different images on one side). The other side of the inserts are all the same, they have comments regarding various City Councillors, along with the text FUCK YOU MUNICIPAL PRICKS.

      Above: The different inserts all have the same reverse
      Info (Follow link & scroll to bottom of page)
      Not much info
      You're nicked son
      NEED info


      MRR #250 - Mike Thorn Top 10 of 2003:
      Honestly words can't describe how much I adore this record. I really and truly think that I might have worn out my own personal copy of this and am well on the way to doing the same to the MRR collections copy. "the Police" is a monster of a song, from the intro that echoes of the WHO's "Baba O'Reilly" to it's stomping POISON IDEA-esque perfect riffing, pissed as all hell vocal delivery, and slashing lyrics about the boys in blue. The flip is a speedy thrasher about the scummy, self-interested politicians, both left and right, who dominate the Toronto political landscape. A totally classic record.

      NOT A GAME # 2 Interview (2003 or 2004):
      Damian: Municipal Prick is not even about municipal politicians but it is about the police chief. I put in Jack Layton as my contribution because these guys are all on his nuts, but I don’t like him.

      2004 Interview:
      We just want people to have to pay attention to be into our band. If you don’t, there is always shit you miss. People tell me that they dig the music on the records, but did you take a second look at the matrix numbers to see if they mean anything? Or read the typing on Police carefully? (1)

      2011? Quote:
      Our second record, released all the way back in 2003. And we still play this song. Every show. I hate my life. (2)

      Random stuff:
      Record has first part of coded message etched into vinyl (see matrix info above).

      'Old Bill' Insert has hidden messages in backwards text and binary code

      Various sources refer to the first press having the DY-33, rather than DER-33 catalogue reference. This appears to be an error; DY-33 does not seem to exist.    

      Sleeve Notes:

      Front cover image shows riot Police baton-charging student protesters during the May 1968  protests in Paris. The insurrections were said to be partly influenced by the political theory, ideas and writing of Situationist International

      Extracts from NYT Article: ''Paris, May 1968: The revolution that never was'':
      The objectives were self-management by workers, a decentralization of economic and political power and participatory democracy at the grass roots. The great fear was that contemporary capitalism was capable of absorbing any and all critical ideas or movements and bending them to its own advantage. Hence, the need for provocative shock tactics... 
      ...Was this utopian impulse, as religious and political conservatives have often charged, a naïve and dangerous dream? It did not aim at human perfectibility but only at imagining that life could really be different and a whole lot better.
      In any case, the utopian impulse is no longer much in evidence. Today's dreams seem to be much more defensive in nature - damping down wars, fending off hunger, containing epidemics and preventing planetary destruction. (3)

      Commodity Fetishism:

      Hand-drawn cover 6/10 - Front

      Hand-drawn cover 6/10 - Full

      Hand-drawn cover 6/10 -  Dust sleeve

      Hand-drawn cover (#?) - Front

      Test Press - blank labels
      Test Press - hand-written labels

      (1) MRR Interview - on Looking For Gold Blog
      (2) FU online store
      (3) New York Times Article